Thursday, March 23, 2017

A long term relationship is unlike any other relationship that you have with your friends. But you don't necessarily need to have everything in common to be in a healthy relationship. In fact, we're fairly certain that most relationship counselors would agree that you don't have to have the same taste in music or movies to live happily ever after. It's really all about compromise and other things that will allow you both to see a future together. So here are a couple of signs that will totally indicate if your relationship is standing tall and strong. 

#1. The world outside might be chaos, but your relationship is the ultimate safe zone. 
When you're in a healthy relationship, you and your partner have essentially created a safe bubble where you can both share experiences, feel comforted and guarded, especially when everything else is falling apart.

#2. Despite your obvious imperfections, you both choose to see the best in each other. 

You choose to appreciate what's good about each other rather than nitpick and whine and find reasons to end the relationship. In essence, you're focusing on the pros by remembering the good times rather than wasting energy on the worst sides of each other. 
#3. Trust and loyalty are never an issue because you trust each other implicitly. 
When you're in a healthy relationship, the urge to check on them goes away. Even when they act a certain way that is unusual from their normal behavior, body language, and mannerism. You still put blind faith in them.

#4. You're both grateful about the little things in life, even in the wake of a crisis. 
You might have just lost your home in a tornado, a flood, or a fire, but you look at each other and are still grateful that you have each other. A relationship that practices daily gratitude will ultimately produce a positive outcome.

#5. Even though you're married, you keep dating each other as if you'd just met. 
You go to a bar, a restaurant, Disney World, or Paris... it really doesn't matter, because you don't need to spend quality time with anyone but the person you love. So every date feels like the first date, and not the last.

#6. Couples fight all the time. It's unavoidable, but you also know how to let things go. 
It's a great sign of a healthy relationship when you can be flexible enough to move beyond the anger, let things go, and make up because it shows you're both easy going and loving towards each other.

#7. You love your partner for who they are, and not what you want them to be. 
You love your significant other for who they were the moment you met them and you never hope, dream, or try to change them, because thinking you can mold someone into an unrealistic image is the wrong way to go.

#8. You show love every single day, not just on Valentine's Day or your anniversary. 
A great sign of a healthy relationship is based on creative intimacy, connection, and most importantly, positive expression of love through words, gestures, and acts every day.

#9. Yes, you fight, but then you can't wait to make up so you can be in each other's arms again. 
We're all going to have those moments where we're going to disagree with each other. That's just life. But when you're willing to put the anger aside and forgive each other to stay together, you've really got something there.

#10. Mutual trust and respect is essential for a healthy relationship to flourish. 
If you have it, then it means you also have open communication and honest dialogues about values, goals and expectations about each other and your future together. But they also require freedom of expression with the fear of retribution as well as respect for each other's differences.

#11. Conversations about big life decisions and conversations about nothing will help you to bond. 
It doesn't make you weak to share your fears and feelings about big life changes, whether that involves moving in together, getting married, or having children. If you're both honest and open, you can roll with the punches that life throws at you.

#12. You surprise each other in a positive way for no reason at all, other than to make each other happy. 
The surprise doesn't have to be big or overly materialistic. It could be something simple like a love letter in a briefcase or a purse. It can also mean inviting your significant other for a surprise date at their favorite restaurant.

#13. Nobody's perfect, and one of you is bound to do or say something that will annoy the other person. 
But in a healthy relationship, each individual avoids making big statements like "you always" or "you never", because you know that one bad behavior should never define them throughout your relationship. So you treat each instance as a unique event instead.

#14. No matter how mad you get, you never threaten to leave or dump them. 
Fights between couples can get pretty heated, but no matter how bitter you get or how badly you might want to walk out forever in that moment, you never use the word "leaving" as ammo to hurt your significant other.

#15. You show interest and support in your partner's hobbies and passions in life. 
It doesn't matter if they want to drop everything and apply to medical school, or if they want to play golf every weekend. You'll be happy for them no matter what and will be a source of encouragement because their happiness is your happiness.

#16. Happiness is a shared event, so you can't wait to tell your significant other when you have good news. 
That's because you know that your partner will share in your happiness, which is something that only healthy happy couples can really understand.

#17. You love to spend quality time together doing something or absolutely nothing. 
It can be something simple like reading the newspaper together at the breakfast table or wasting the day away on the couch binging on Netflix. In the end, healthy couples simply want to spend quality time together connecting with each other.

#18. You choose to be happy rather than to be right when a fight happens in a relationship. 
You wind up taking responsibility by saying "I'm sorry because I..." which shows that your apology is sincere. Remember, that saying you're sorry isn't about trying to make the fight go away, but rather about overcoming the issue with your partner.

#19. You love to make your partner laugh because, as they say, it is the best medicine. 
It's also a key to happiness, because a good, hearty laugh relieves physical tension, stress, and boosts your immune system. And you can't tell us you wouldn't want to make your partner laugh if it means making their lives a little better.

#20. You do whatever it takes to ensure that your significant other is happy. 
It doesn't matter if they want to move to a new city, a new state or out of an apartment and into a new home. It's all about wanting to make your partner happy without even thinking of yourself. If they truly love you, they'll feel the same way. So it balances out.

#21. You use sex to deepen your emotional as well as physical connection, rather than fill a void.
Good sex involves feeling validated on a physical and emotional level. So you know you're in a happy relationship if your partner can fill both of these requirements. If not, then all you're getting is external happiness, which fizzles out fast.

#22. You can voice your opinions and speak your mind freely without fear of judgment.
You both know that you might not always agree on the same things. For example, you might be a Republican and your partner might be a Democratic. Naturally, these two sides will rarely agree. But you can both listen to each other and respond with respect and still love each other.

#23. You've discovered that the secret to a long-term relationship lies in growth.
There's nothing more rewarding than a couple that pushes each other lovingly towards a greater purpose, and a better self in order to develop each other's potential. So essentially you grow together in other ways than simply aging.

#24. Having time for yourself is never an issue for you or your partner because you respect each other.
Personal space is a psychological necessity because everyone knows that when couples spend too much time together, they wind up sacrificing time with friends and avoid old hobbies. It's also a sign of extreme insecurity when personal space isn't granted. But if it is, then everything's awesome.

#25. You don't place blame on your partner if you've failed to achieve your goals.
Even when you're in a relationship, you take time to pursue your own personal life goals and allow your partner to do the same. If you failed to do so, you don't blame your partner for your failures, because a relationship that gets in the way of your goals isn't worth pursuing.

#26. You give yourself freely to your significant other, but you never ask for anything in return.
Some would argue that the goal of a healthy relationship involves giving and taking. But the truth is that if you avoid putting expectations of getting anything in return, you won't be disappointed. On the other hand, if you do get something in return, you'll be pleasantly surprised.

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